It has been about 5 months since the last update, and my, how it has flown! The last time I wrote about our situation, we were facing the end of my theology course and of Hannah's paid maternity with no prospects in sight. Since then, I have not only finished my course, but we have bagged not just one, but two new jobs!
I'm delighted to have accepted a part time job with my college Westminster Theological Centre as Gloucester Hub Director. This means basically I'll be responsible for running the regional learning hub where students in the South West come to have their lectures, video conference seminars and engage together as a learning community through worship, relationships and study. I've been part of this community as a student for the past two years and it's been a wonderful experience. Now I get to help others have the same experience! It is such a blessing to have this job, which I can fit around my church work, and which means I can stay involved with the college that I love so much. I am so grateful to God for guiding me here!
Finishing my Graduate Diploma in Kingdom Theology is sad, but also a relief - I've done well, but have had to work really hard (possibly too hard) to achieve what I have. That said, I don't really know how to do things like this half-cock, and I came to the course so hungry to learn and grow. So many of my understandings and assumptions about the Christian faith (and about God himself) have been challenged / affirmed / overturned / reshaped / redeemed (delete as applicable) that I don't really know where to start in describing it. I think my faith is more humane now - less dogmatic but more quietly confident. I still struggle a lot with prayer, self-discipline, personal holiness and the nature of Scripture, but I feel so much more equipped to deal with these struggles now. Moreover, I feel massively more able to empathize and speak life to others who have deep questions about God. Mere accepted wisdom has given way to tentative but more satisfying ways forward, and certain tensions to do with doctrine and ethics have been faced head-on. On some issues - the Atonement, providence - I feel like I'm at a perennial crossroads between mainstream evangelicalism and more 'progressive' (or simply non-evangelical) approaches. Whether I feel the need to plump for definitive positions or not is a moot point. The cross of Christ and the wisdom of God have only expanded in their richness and significance through study and appropriating those meanings in my life. Aquinas said: 'Whatever is more excellent must be attributed to God.' I guess I'm working out what true excellence is.
Ministry life at Holy Trinity continues to be good. I'm still enjoying worship leading, even if it can be a slog at times, week-in, week-out. I have been focusing still on mentoring individuals - God seems to put more people in my path who appreciate this kind of discipling investment, and I love it. More and more, my call I think is to lead and pastor small groups of people. Sometimes I feel like a fraud because of my own poverty of spirituality. And yet, at the times when I've bothered to listen, God has been saying some beautiful things to me. Learning to trust him, and learning that he trusts me (even though I screw up) is a journey; sometimes terrifying, sometimes wonderful, sometimes boring, sometimes ecstatic. But always the road winds on and on.
Hannah also has a new job - in fact she started it today! (I'm on kids duty today, and writing this while they are having their nap.) She's working as a Project Archivist for Bath Record Office, and is now an employee of BANES council! Again, this is a huge blessing and an answer to prayer: we prayed: "Lord, a part-time archivist job in Bath would be great." Boom. It is great for her to get back to work, and though it is very tight with the kids (she has them when I'm at work; and I have them when she's at work) we do have Saturdays as a family day (as long as other commitments don't sneak in) and significantly, it means we are financially OK for the next year! We also have tenants in our house in Linlithgow, after a worry-inducing, money-sapping period of about three months when the house was empty.
Early in 2014 someone at Holy Trinity gave us a significant amount of money. We don't know who it was (they gave it anonymously) but we are so grateful and humbled by this person's generosity! I hope they have been blessed in the giving. For us, it is a massive sign that God is caring for us, and is honouring our decision to move down here and to live the 'unpredictable life' because we believe we are doing what he is calling us to do. I don't understand all the ins-and-outs of how this works. But we choose to trust God and to believe he is working all things to our good as we trust in him. We've had to work hard and make some sacrifices, and keep our part of the deal too, but we feel the movement is from him. God is good, and mysteriously so!
We are also so humbled that people at St Thomas' in Edinburgh have supported us through my course. We can probably never really repay this, but our thanks go to those dear people who have loved us and trusted us. Thanks and praise to God for St Thomas'!
Other things have been going on too - I managed to record and release an album, have another essay published, and am preparing another paper to give at the WTC conference next week. It is all a bit crazy, but it is wonderful to have these creative outlets and opportunities to grow and explore the things God's fashioning in my heart. My process of discernment with the Church of England hasn't progressed massively since February - partly because I've been so busy! But this summer and beyond, this will increasingly be my focus as I look forward (hopefully) to being considered for ordination next year. Then it could be all change yet again... or not. But having the experience under my belt of uprooting and leaning more on God, along with two years of theology and development, I feel much more able to respond to whatever God wants for us as a family.
The kids are really well! Growing all the time! It's exhausting, but they are such a blessing to us, and to each other (most of the time!!)
Frome is good - commuting is a downside (especially now we BOTH work in Bath, and me in Cheltenham once a week!) but we've met some wonderful people here, and the town itself is fun and lively, happy and safe.
Our thanks, love and greetings to everyone who reads this and cares for our family. Praise to Jesus the author and perfecter of our faith!
